The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist. Maybe the greatest trick our all mighty God has ever pulled was convincing the world he did. I used to be a firm believer of religion and the biblical stories of Moses parting the seas, but I can’t help look in the mirror and see someone betrayed by this greater power. Someone who has worked so hard and sacrificed so much to find the smallest of returns. I have always been told that nice guys finish last but in my heart of hearts believed that to be untrue. I pondered over the fact that the men manning the back office were always my closest friends in the firm and the cable guys and maintenance officers were so easy for me to get along with. I figured this was a good thing and that the connection, or bond if you will, that I established with these people were a testament to the type of person I am.
I have now realized that the assholes of this world are the ones that succeed. My greatest idols are the bourgeoisies of our time and the ones that do not care for friends. They spend their days pawning through an endless sea of pussy, not concerned with the world around them and the people they hurt. Yet even knowing this I cannot muster myself to think like these “successful” people that roam our streets and fill the Trump buildings that only add to the ruins of a diminishing city. I continue in my ways, hoping that I will find success in ways other than monetary compensation. It would be nice to see rewards along the way but I will continue being patient. I will continue working hard and sacrificing for the ones I love, because life has slowly taught me that family is the only sure thing we have to hold on to. I am confident that I will never be a millionaire, a successful writer, or someone married to a perfect ten model like that of whom “E” somehow manages to bring to bed; but I am positive that I will always have a supportive and loving family that is willing to risk their friends and reputation for the perpetuity of my happiness. I have never looked a woman in the eye, and in complete vulnerability admitted to her my endless love, but if you ask me, a family willing to risk that much is a family smothered in love. I can only be thankful to have that in my life and hopefully the fire that fuels this love will never dwindle.
To all of my readers… God exists. If not in his ominous form, then he exists in all of our hearts. He represents the hope and optimism that there is something better out there for those who sacrifice for others. Perhaps everything does not happen for a reason, but it could just be better to believe it does. The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist. Maybe the greatest trick our all mighty God has ever pulled was convincing the world he did. Is that necessarily a bad thing or could it just so happen to be the bane of our existence?
Saturday, September 6, 2008
Our Defining Moments
Good people of cyberspace. I come to you for a reason unbenounced to even yours truly. I look out upon the world and I see faces of selfishness and egotism. Do I vent as a way to relieve myself of guilt or do I voice my concern hoping to make a difference in the world? I seem to hope the latter but cannot help believe the worst may be true; that I am no different from the narcissistic assholes that plague this country. Maybe there truly is no such thing as a selfless good deed. Maybe we base decision after decision on future gain instead of friendly favors to the one’s we care for. I find myself manipulated into the financial system of viewing everything in terms of self worth. The stereotypes of investment bankers that I so boldly despised are now ingrained in my flesh and bones.
Yet despite these contradictions that rule my existence, I demand myself to try. I may be unable to revenge the anger of watching my friend take a fist to his face, but perhaps standing by his side in the subsequent moments is enough to remind him that my friendship still exists. We may not learn a great deal from the ingenious remake of Batman, but we should remind ourselves of this; it’s not who we are inside, but what we do that defines us. When facing controversy and paralyzing fear, do you tuck your tail between your legs and relinquish to those willing to fight, or do you stand up for what you believe in? Life is too fucking short, so I request that you walk up to your oversized door mirror, look yourself in those big eyes that surround a body gasping for approval and ask whether or not you are really trying to make a difference. One vegetarian can’t stop cows from being slaughtered; one hybrid car owner can’t redefine auto manufacturing; one selfless good deed can’t amend the millions of selfish deeds that transpire every day; but at least we can try. We walk with one foot in front of the other every day, but seem to forget that a first step must always precede the rest. I may not be perfect and I may never make a difference in this world, but I promise you that I will always try to be the first step.
Yet despite these contradictions that rule my existence, I demand myself to try. I may be unable to revenge the anger of watching my friend take a fist to his face, but perhaps standing by his side in the subsequent moments is enough to remind him that my friendship still exists. We may not learn a great deal from the ingenious remake of Batman, but we should remind ourselves of this; it’s not who we are inside, but what we do that defines us. When facing controversy and paralyzing fear, do you tuck your tail between your legs and relinquish to those willing to fight, or do you stand up for what you believe in? Life is too fucking short, so I request that you walk up to your oversized door mirror, look yourself in those big eyes that surround a body gasping for approval and ask whether or not you are really trying to make a difference. One vegetarian can’t stop cows from being slaughtered; one hybrid car owner can’t redefine auto manufacturing; one selfless good deed can’t amend the millions of selfish deeds that transpire every day; but at least we can try. We walk with one foot in front of the other every day, but seem to forget that a first step must always precede the rest. I may not be perfect and I may never make a difference in this world, but I promise you that I will always try to be the first step.
Saturday, August 30, 2008
Happyness
The world is how any miserable person would imagine it to be. Like the Nolan brothers so humbly put; simple, solid all the way through. Are we really divided between suites and the creative? Must we classify ourselves as business men or artists? Every life has a screenplay but we criticize those who turn them into pieces of work. Every deal has legal remedies but we mock the bankers that bring them to fruition. We place ourselves on specific notches of an imaginable spectrum but we gladly live in each one even if only for a few moments. We want to be what we’re not but feel the need to pride ourselves on what we are. Communism preaches to a dying choir but is it far from what we deeply desire? A world where we are free to do what we please. If money wasn’t the root of all that is worshiped in this contradictory place we call the USA what would we find when we looked in the mirror? A banker? A screenwriter? A high school volleyball coach? Or maybe just someone who loves his family more than the renowned faces of our past president’s printed on worthless pieces of green paper.
I’ve run across a few many faces in my time that have asked the seemingly hypothetical question of why we are here. What our purpose is in this world. I’m not a scholar or an acclaimed professor but my answer is simple. To find happiness. We want a meaning for the word, but it differs for the 6 billion different people that roam our planet. I wish it were more selfless or complex but through these dark brown eyes, the simple explanation is a word most 10 year olds spell with a droop y; Happiness. Unimaginable for some, unattainable for most, the word brings with it so much more than just 9 letters.
But my advice to you is this. Don’t define the word based on the expectations of your friends family and the corrupt hypocritical media. Find what makes you happy and do whatever it takes to hold on to it. I always halfheartedly listened to the words of my parents accompanied with rolling eyes as they scolded me for being too young to understand this and too young to understand that. Well for the first time in my life I have realized that I will always be too young to understand. But our world is the here and now and like the great reincarnation of George Jung said, life passes most people by while they’re busy making grand plans for it. So enjoy the few things that make you happy. Make new friends, keep the old, and for god’s sake, stay goofy for as long as you can. Laughter doesn't just add years to your life it saves you in the years you’re living now. So like our forefathers foretold, pursue this thing we call happiness. You may find the pursuit is worth more than the double M resting on the front of the two toned overpriced car you spend your wakeless hours dreaming of.
I’ve run across a few many faces in my time that have asked the seemingly hypothetical question of why we are here. What our purpose is in this world. I’m not a scholar or an acclaimed professor but my answer is simple. To find happiness. We want a meaning for the word, but it differs for the 6 billion different people that roam our planet. I wish it were more selfless or complex but through these dark brown eyes, the simple explanation is a word most 10 year olds spell with a droop y; Happiness. Unimaginable for some, unattainable for most, the word brings with it so much more than just 9 letters.
But my advice to you is this. Don’t define the word based on the expectations of your friends family and the corrupt hypocritical media. Find what makes you happy and do whatever it takes to hold on to it. I always halfheartedly listened to the words of my parents accompanied with rolling eyes as they scolded me for being too young to understand this and too young to understand that. Well for the first time in my life I have realized that I will always be too young to understand. But our world is the here and now and like the great reincarnation of George Jung said, life passes most people by while they’re busy making grand plans for it. So enjoy the few things that make you happy. Make new friends, keep the old, and for god’s sake, stay goofy for as long as you can. Laughter doesn't just add years to your life it saves you in the years you’re living now. So like our forefathers foretold, pursue this thing we call happiness. You may find the pursuit is worth more than the double M resting on the front of the two toned overpriced car you spend your wakeless hours dreaming of.
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